Let’s Get Selfish

The word ‘selfish’ gets a bad rep, right? 

The reason being, the very words conjure up images of greed, ego, arrogance. Looking out only for yourself and always putting yourself before others.

Part of that is true. You should be aware of your surroundings and other people. 

But not to your own detriment. 

What happens is that people confuse ‘selfish’ with ‘self-centered’ behavior.

Selfish is when you’re concerned primarily with your own interests.

Self-centered is when you’re concerned solely with your own interests.

That one change in word, from primarily to solely makes all the difference. 

Yet we have the tendency to not put ourselves first, to not shout from the rooftops the things we really want to experience in our businesses and lives.

I’m bringing this up because I recently had the experience of engaging in a bit of selfish behavior. 

I celebrated my birthday last week. 

In the midst of everything that’s going on in our world, in our state, in my town, this was one of the best birthdays yet. 

Yes, some of that can be attributed to the fact that I am an introvert and homebody. But in this global crisis, it’s clarified what I want for my life, what’s important and not, how I want to show up in the world.

I’m crystal clear now. 

And when it came to my birthday and how I chose to mark the occasion, I knew exactly what it would look like. 

It was selfish of me to declare that I wanted to:

• Wake up in the morning and lounge about with a cup of coffee while taking in a new book for over two hours. 
• Enjoy a long walk with my dogs in the summer-like air. 
• Try a new cocktail recipe, which included spending a little extra to buy the one ingredient I didn’t have on hand and is a unitasker.
• Let my husband run out to pick up the delicious dinner while I delighted in a little more quiet time at home.
• Be in bed by 8:30pm.

It was also glorious. 

And totally not something that my friends or family or ever husband may have found super fun. 

But I did. 

And it didn’t knock the Earth off its axis. 

The point is, I didn’t concern myself with “What do they want to do for my birthday?” but rather “What do I want to do for my birthday?”

And better yet, it felt incredible. 

Which got me thinking about how many instances in life, whether in business or going about our days, do we NOT put ourselves first for no reason beyond what we assume others will think about us. 

Where do you find yourself not being a bit selfish in your business?
What’s one small step you can do to put your needs first?

Photo by Jason Yoder on Unsplash